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| The book my poem was published in anonymously. |
Frost covered the windows in my little apartment as I sat thinking about the festivities that would define my life in a few short months. In June (1980) I would graduate with an education degree from Bowling Green State University and would be married six days later. It didn't take much reflection to realize I owed a debt of gratitude to many who helped me along the way. Even so, it was my mother, more than any other, who taught me by example and inspired me.
As I felt the chill in the air, I whispered a prayer asking for some divine assistance to help me express what was on my heart. It was then the words came. They came to me like a gift I could barely unwrap fast enough and I knew my prayer had been answered.
My mom read "When You Thought I Wasn't Looking" for the first time following my college graduation when I presented her with a framed copy. She would later hear it straight from my heart at our wedding reception. I sang a medley of songs as my way of thanking guests for being an honored part of our day. My older sister, Carol, was the only one attending who knew I planned to conclude with a musical rendition of "When You Thought I Wasn't Looking." It was an amazing moment. Love seemed to illuminate the entire room. When guests asked for copies, I knew my tribute had been understood and well received. Not wanting to disappoint anyone to whom I had promised a copy, prints were made and tucked into thank you notes I sent out that summer.
While I thought that was the end of the story, God apparently had other plans. You see, it was really only the beginning.
Fast forward 17 years to June 6, 1997. While reading A Fourth Course of Chicken Soup for the Soul (a mother's day gift from my husband and three children), I turned to page 136. There I found "When You Thought I Wasn't Looking" glaring back at me like some kind of ghost. I tried to revive my ability to breathe when I noticed the words "Author Unknown" resting at the bottom of the page.
How did my mother's tribute find its way to the pages of this best seller? Answers came as we unraveled the mystery one book at a time. Chicken Soup gleaned it from Stories for the Heart compiled by Alice Gray. Ms. Gray first spotted my work in a book titled Learning to Love When Love Isn't Easy written by Dr. David Walls. We learned that Dr. Walls is a minister in my hometown of Elyria, Ohio where my poem was shared publicly for the first time. Dr. Walls could not recall who had given him a copy of my poem without my name. Nevertheless, it struck a chord with him and he included it in his book.
I am humbled and thrilled to discover my mother's tribute lives on. As it continues to tour the world via book, internet, and refrigerator door, I want people to know there is an author to this piece. Even more, I want people to know there is someone very special who inspired it.
Raising six children (three boys and three girls) was a full-time "adventure" for my mom. If she'd had time to write about it, she could have added to the tales penned by Erma Bombeck. "Never a dull moment" was a way of life in our household. We were encouraged to take swim lessons, music lessons, conduct backyard musicals, be a class officer and sing in the choir. It was her idea that we "be all that we could be" before it became a slogan for the Army National Guard. She put in days that would exhaust most people to even think about. And she did it with style. Generosity wasn't her motto. It was her life. Other people talk about love. She personifies it.
When I was a junior in high school, my mother wrote a most beautiful letter to me. I've carried it in my wallet ever since. It's with her permission that I share this lifelong treasure.
January 29, 1975
Dear Mary,
How can I explain to you that my whole day will be spent devoted to you and all the other Juniors for the true success of your retreat. Actually I am asking God to accept everything I do as a special prayer for you. I won't be kneeling in Church in front of the altar all day, but I am offering all my works, joys and failures to Him, so that He may use them as He sees fit. This, my day of prayers I offer to you. I will also make a visit this morning.
I know you may not understand sometimes but my life is really spent as a prayer for you. I love you very, very much and do so want the very best God has to offer you. Having a daughter like you is like wearing a special adornment, a piece of shining jewelry, or a very beautiful living flower. A most precious gift from God. You will never really understand until someday when you look upon your own little gift of Love.
May God shine His blessings upon you and keep you in His loving care. Never forget Him. Devote everything you do to Him and He will enrich every part of your life. He is a living, loving, always listening God.
May God bless you all abundantly and have a really beautiful day!
Love and prayers,
Mom
She is the yardstick by which I measure goodness and integrity. Her friends call her an angel, a living saint, a pillar of faith. I get to call her, Mom.
My most recently published poem published in The Blessings of Friendship by Mary Engelbreit
Friends Are Like the Sun
I watched the sun nestle down in the clouds
camouflaging them in colors
of red and pink and distant blues.
I watched as it touched and changed shadows
and water and me
inside out.
I am absolutely sure
that friends are like the sun.
The joy is the same in their coming
as is the sadness
at their parting
and sometimes
you might not see them
for a whole hour
or night
or more ...
But you know that they will come back
like the sun
because there is promise
in the stars.
© 1979 Mary Korzan
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| With my
son Joshua. Photo ©2001 Santiago Flores All rights reserved. |
| Copyright ©2001 Mary Rita Schilke Korzan |
